Merry Christmas to everyone!

                    It's Christmas!

 

Christmas decorations/Christmas gifts/My Christmas candles on my desk/Champagne 

I'm a bit sad we don't have any snow here in Helsinki, but our house is full of Christmas decorations and my family and friends make me feel the magic of Christmas :) 

Our fireplace/Christmas                  flowers/Traditional Christmas flower/Our Christmas penguin 

My Christmas look/Merry Christmas!/Gift from myself to myself/Christmas morning and my new lovely silky dressing gown

I wish Merry Christmas to all of my readers and all of you who has visited my blog :) Enjoy the holidays! 

                 xoxo Dora

I could not be happier to be home

                                            Hello Christmas

It's now a year since I came back from New Zealand. Year ago I got to see my family and friends again. 18th of december 2012 I was finally back in Finland. I would not have to go back and I was with my family again. I was
back home. 

I feel like I need to talk about how my exchange was not the best year of my life, or something else people usually say about their exchange, because usually you only hear about how awesome it was, and people feel ashamed to say that their exchange was maybe not the best one. It's somehow embarrassing if you didn't have the best exchange ever. Well, you did not fail. No matter what they say. Easy for them to blame the foreign exchange student. There is things we could've done differently, but we're not the only ones who need to readjust. I did have good moments and I do have good memories (of course) but I do have bad memories too. I do not blame anyone and I'm not going to yell at anyone because by breaking other people I will not fix myself. I'm not going to blame myself either, even though a many people would think everything was my fault and I should blame myself. I won't. I know I could've done many things
differently, but so could've so many other people. We all make mistakes. I've learned my lesson, and that should be enough.

I can't say I'd actually regret it. It was an experience. Experience, during which I grew up. I learned a lot about myself and about other people, I learned to stand up on my own and I now know I will be fine alone too.

Not only to say bad things about my exchange, I liked my high school and I did got true friends who didn't turn their back on me. I can't thank you people enough, who stayed by my side and who were my friends at school and else. I was happy to go to school, I learned a lot, my language skills got better and I got to do music and theatre which I loved and which taught me a lot.

When people ask me about my exchange, I rather not talk about it. I might say ''well, it wasn't the best year of my life, but I learned a lot''. I've probably said that learning things million times, but I can not say it enough! I see many things differently now. My point of view has changed on many things. 

Above all, I got courage. I grew strong and independent. I got hurt, but I survived. 

Would I go back? No. Would I go, if someone would show me a video how it's gonna be? No. Would I go if I'd get to try again? No. Will I ever go back? I don't know. For now, I can't. Can I ever? I have no answer to that. 

I've coped well. I finished my school - just got my life back on track, and notwithstanding the big changes in my life I tried just to continue my everyday life.

But I couldn't be happier to be home. That's definitely true. It wasn't my place or my year, but it's long gone now. Not to remember all the bad things, but the good ones. The bad memories won't go away though, so I do keep thinking of them. I just try to focus more on the good memories.

Not too many days till Christmas! And I'm home. 

xoxo Dora

Getting ready for my graduation

 Oh My Gosh!

 It seems to be tomorrow! My graduation. Crazy huh? I graduate from high school. School's out! (High school at least)

I am so happy because I see results -  I've been on a diet for two months because of tomorrow and I've been working out too. It's so rewarding to see results, and hopefully I will look amazing in my dress. 

Fine, I admit, I've been working out my arms a lot… But I wanted them to look good in my dress! And I like my biceps. Though they could always be bigger!

I am so proud of that tummy. Thank you so much 2 months diet and cravings that I resisted (like cereals and croissants at breakfast time). Though for example eating porridge with cottage cheese for breakfast has become a lifestyle for me. You can get addicted to healthy eating too! Not kidding! 

I am fine with my body. I feel better when I work out and I'm always happy to  see the results and to improve my body. I can always change it to be better, but I am pleased with my body right now too. I live in it, so I should be happy with it! It's mine and only mine. I carry it with happiness. 

Those shoulders aren't much (or big) as you can see. But I'm working on it! I am progress. But they'll at least look good when I'm wearing my dress. 

Everything seems to be ready for tomorrow. I have my dress, my cap, shoes and everything else too. Now I should chill out but I can't relax - I'm just running around because I am so nervous! 

I am nervous because I have been honored to give the speech (of a graduated student). But it will go well, I'm sure. I just can't look around because if people cry, I will start to cry too! 

This is my cap! 

We went to take some test photos last week. Here you can see few of them! I wish we had snow, but no can do. I'm sure the photos will be amazing without snow too!

They're taken by my dear friend Aino. I love you. You're simply the best.

Here in Finland graduation from high school is a pretty big thing. We have this huge party and all family and friends will be invited. We get a dress (or else) of our dreams and a white cap that tells everyone you graduated successfully. I compare this to New Zealand, where graduation from high school is no big deal (I've done it).. Everyone is just in their school uniforms and there is no party or anything. There the big thing is if you get into University and when you graduate from University I guess. Not sure though!

I am pleased with my leaving certificate. I got pretty good grades in my opinion. They're good enough for me, and I'm happy with them, so that's enough. 

My dress is still a secret! But I promise you some photos later.

Here you can see my lashes! I got lash extensions and I love them. They're perfect. Not too much, but to make an impression and to turn heads! So happy.

Well what else? I don't know. I'm nervous. And stressed. And you'll get more photos later! 

Wish me luck!

xoxo Dora